Category Archives: Women’s Lives

LIVE LIFE BY YOUR OWN RULES

What would you do if you found yourself retired, then realized that you just weren’t ready? If you’re Ben Whittaker (Robert De Niro) from The Intern, you’d start all over again from the bottom. Enter Jules Ostin (Anne Hathaway) who owns her own online fashion empire. Her company has recently put out an ad for […]

Read more

TO GREY OR NOT TO GREY – A Deeper Meaning

I recently joined an online writing group. Each day a topic is shared that we all write about and comment on. When the topic of whether or not to show up in the world with grey hair or to keep coloring, it seemed to trigger some deeper emotion, but what? When a woman changes her […]

Read more

MY MINI RETREAT

I don’t know if it’s because of lent – a time of death and resurrection, but it seems that a number of my friends, as well as myself, have been going through some kind of transition lately. For a while now there’s been a battle going on inside me that’s pitted intuition against logic. And […]

Read more

PARENTING IN THE 21st. CENTURY

Once upon a time, a son or daughter would grow up, find a job, get married, and shortly thereafter, have a baby or two, or six. They’d live in the same community, and often drop by for Sunday dinner of roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, potatoes, carrots and gravy. Perhaps followed by apple dumplings with lemon […]

Read more

A Woman’s Strength

Those of you who have read my book River of the Stick Wavers, or who have tuned in to my blog, will know that I like to write about how women move through their world. In River of the Stick Wavers my main character, Grace is trying to figure out her place in the world […]

Read more

A Woman’s Journey

An innocent born out of desire, turns into a child, girl, woman made out of porcelain. She is a prisoner of her sex. She is haunted, poisoned, turned inside out of herself. Until anger sets up a fever inside her body. She struggles in the ferocious darkness to awaken or die. She lies naked, bleeding, […]

Read more

Women and Power

What do you think would have happened if a woman had discovered American and not Christopher Columbus?  Instead of forcing the Indians to adopt the ways of the white man, perhaps a woman might have acted differently toward the Indians and therefore, prevented the turn of events that systematically destroyed much of the indigenous tribes […]

Read more

Dragonfly in Amber – Being Stuck

In Season 2 of the Outlander series, there’s a scene where a 20th century Claire comes across a dragonfly in amber on display in a museum.  This dragonfly in amber was a wedding gift given to her by Hugh Munro after she married Jamie Fraser in 1746.  To me, the dragonfly in amber symbolizes being […]

Read more

The Mandorla

It’s funny how when you are searching for answers, the universe has a way of putting it in your path.  I recently wrote a post about diversity, particularly about what it would feel like to be neither masculine nor feminine.  Then up pops this article about the mandorla.  In The Book of SHE, Sara Avant […]

Read more

How To Respond To Your Inner Needs

Life is busy.  If we life in this world, it’s a well-known fact that the pace of life is skyrocketing to astronomical heights.  We have so many choices:  to work or not to work; to join this club or that club or maybe all the clubs; to have children or not to have children; to […]

Read more

Me A Feminist?

While sitting in a Tim Horton’s one day, a friend asked me if I was a feminist.  I was taken aback by the question. “I don’t even know what a feminist is.”  She asked if I believe in equality for men and women.  “Well yes,” I replied.  “Then you’re a feminist,” she answered. It seems […]

Read more

Rest is a Four Letter Word

According to Sara Avant Stover, author of The Book of SHE we treat rest as a four letter word in our society today.  She goes on to talk about being out of touch with our feminine menses cycle, or if you no longer menstruate, cycles of the moon.  During the first day of our menses, […]

Read more

Be Your Own Best Friend – Doing It Alone (Part 2)

I just got back from listening to Margaret Atwood speak at the Alice Munro Festival in Blyth and wanted to share my thoughts before they disappear into the fine mist of my memory.  What can anyone say about Margaret Atwood?  She’s a well-known, prolific writer of many genres.  At 76 she has three pieces of literature […]

Read more

Be Your Own Best Friend – Part 1

Do you find it difficult doing things on your own?  Do you prefer to spend time with others because it gives you energy?  Would you rather stay home alone, than go out by yourself?  I think the answer varies depending on who you talk to.  I know that I’ve done a few things on my […]

Read more

Full Circle

I was going through my book shelf the other day to see if I had some books that talk about the different phases of a woman’s life.  You see, I’m in the process of preparing a presentation about this very topic, and the books I ordered haven’t come in yet.  So, rather than sit around […]

Read more

Ask And You Shall Receive

As a parent, and a woman, it is not uncommon for me to put the needs of others before my own.  I think this is in part, due to the fact that I’ve been taught that it’s selfish to put my needs above someone else’s.  While putting the needs of others before my own is […]

Read more

Things I Learned At The Feet Of My Children

  When I was in my forties I decided that I wanted to learn how to play the piano.  When I expressed this desire to my daughter’s piano teacher, she offered to instruct me.  I knew that once I started lessons, there would be no quitting.  I had to set an example for my child.  […]

Read more

Perfectionism

I don’t know how many times in my life I have sabotaged my own success because I’m afraid of failing.  It seems I would rather quit than be seen as a failure.  At least then, I am the one who chooses my own path, not someone else because they have decided I’m not good enough.  […]

Read more

You Are Good Enough

Do you remember in the movie, Bridget Jones’ Diary, when Mr. Darcy told Bridget that he liked her just the way she was?  We all went, “Aaaw” and fell a little bit in love with Mr. Darcy in that moment.  Here was the rich, educated Barrister, falling for the bumbling Bridget, who was forever getting […]

Read more

Reflections On A Marriage

It’s interesting to watch a newly married couple.  They look at each other with such love and devotion in their eyes don’t they?  I often wonder what their relationship will be like in a few years from now.  Will they have weathered the rough spots that life will inevitably throw their way?  Or will they […]

Read more

Age of Impermanence

Life is impermanent.  It is a truth that we are able to bear throughout most of our lives.  A child is born and we look forward with anticipation as it learns to walk, talk, and become independent. The years of schooling shape and develop the child’s character, values, likes and dislikes, until finally it becomes […]

Read more

Into The Underground

  “What poor bargain does every woman make?”  This is the question Clarrisa Pinkola Estes asks on page 395 of Women who run with the Wolves.  Her answer:  “We forfeit our deep knowing life for one that is far more frail … we surrender our wild nature for a promise of something that seems rich […]

Read more

Patience – The Art of Doing Nothing

There’s been an undercurrent of struggle going on beneath the surface of my life at the moment.  I know that some kind of transition is taking place within me, but I don’t know how it’s going to play out.  When I told my friend Suzanne about my struggle and she asked if I was the […]

Read more

Women and Trees – What’s the Connection?

I’ve always felt a strong connection to trees.  Even as a child growing up in England I felt safe among the tree edging the Llangollen Canal at Wrenbury Bridge.  In fact this is the first time I came to know the presence of God or, something greater than myself.  In later years I spent many […]

Read more

Cycle Of Love

There is a Life/Death/Life cycle of love that Clarissa Pinkola Estes writes about in “Women Who Run with the Wolves,” that I find most interesting.  She believes that every relationship has this cycle and that in order to know the deepest kind of love, we need to embrace it.  The Life part of the cycle […]

Read more

Life Rhythms – Part 2

After I wrote my post, Life Rhythms last week, I spent some time talking to my friend Joan about the concept.  Turns out that the rhythm of her own life has changed in a big way recently, so we sat on the patio overlooking the Thames River and discussed the matter in depth. Most days […]

Read more

Life Rhythms – Part 1

Did you ever have one of those days where no matter what you do, you can’t get it together?  I’ve been having one of those days for the past three days now.  Whenever I go away for a week, or even a weekend, I have a hard time getting back into the rhythm of my […]

Read more

Women’s Intuition

I always thought that intuition was something that turns up when you least expect it.  It’s certainly not a thing that anyone seems to pay much heed to, least of all me – certainly not on a regular basis. Although, having said that, I do recall times in my life when a voice inside has […]

Read more

Anger: The Path to Enlightenment

Anger as a path to enlightenment.  How is this even possible, you may be wondering?  Anger is a bad thing, you say.  Something that must be suppressed at all costs.  If I let go of my anger, I will be out of control.  But what if anger is the psyche’s way of reminding you that […]

Read more

The Danger of Secrets

We’ve all held on to a secret at one time or another.  The secret party, the secret lover, the secret travel destination, or the shared secret with a friend.  To be one of the chosen few who shares such a secret makes us feel special, part of the inner circle of those “in the know.”  […]

Read more

Evolving Motherhood

  I think it’s true when they say that as mothers we spend our lives teaching our children how to become independent, yet when they grow up, we long for them to want to spend time with us. I know when my daughter first learned to walk, I sat down and cried.  “My little girl […]

Read more

The Dual Nature Of Women

This week I’d like to look at another chapter in Clarissa Pinkola Estes’ book The Women Who Run with the Wolves called, The Mate: Union With the Other.  In it she talks about how women have a dual nature.  While I didn’t get a real sense of what she believes a woman’s dual nature is, she […]

Read more

Kindred Spirits – Finding Your People.

I always thought the story of The Ugly Duckling was about transformation.  But according to Clarissa Pinkola Estes, author of Women Who Run with the Wolves, it is a story about finding your pack, or as I like to call it –kindred spirits.   As the story goes the egg of the ugly duckling (or swan […]

Read more

Returning To The Self

A few years ago, when I was home sick I spent three days lying around in my pajamas reading a Pride and Prejudice sequel.  It was heaven.  How often did I take time for myself?  I’m certainly not in the habit of wearing PJs during the day time unless I’m ill.  And taking entire days […]

Read more

Paper Bag Courage

I’ve been thinking a lot about strong women lately.  Particularly about how women become strong.  I’m not talking about physical strength, but inner strength that allows women to be the hero of their own story. Becoming a strong woman is a process that can begin at any time and be on-going.  I think it is […]

Read more

Life Passages

I started to reflect about the passage of time on my thirtieth birthday.  I worried that half my life was over and I had nothing to show for it.  I had no children, no career. I had a job at the library but that’s not the same as a career.  I wanted more.  That was […]

Read more

Female Friendship

I got the idea to write about female friendship after I saw a play at the Blyth Festival the summer of 2014.  Set in 1968, Kitchen Radio is a story about Eleanor who lacks female friendship due to her husband’s latest transfer.  She fills her loneliness by listening to the local country radio station. Until, […]

Read more

Garden of Unborn Dreams

As I meandered over the tree-covered paths and bridges of Maple Leaf Cemetery on my bike one sunny Sunday morning, I came across the Garden to the Unborn.  This was a new development, or at least one I hadn’t noticed before.  I slammed on my brakes to get a closer look. I began to wonder […]

Read more

Shifting Sand

You would think that when I turned fifty, it would have been a difficult time for me, but it wasn’t.  In fact that year I got a new bike for my birthday, took up roller blading as well as horse-back riding.  It was great.  Fifty-five, on the other hand, was not.  So what happened? The […]

Read more

The Button

My girlfriend Mia recently asked if I had a fictional story to share on my blog.  I went through all the stories I have written over the years and found this one filed away and brought it up to speed. I hope you like it.  This one’s for you Mia. It all started with a button. […]

Read more

The Labyrinth

I was at Five Oaks, a United Church Retreat Centre in Paris, Ontario for a writing weekend.  My novel wasn’t going very well and I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to write anything.  When I told the instructor Nora how I was feeling she suggested I write about the struggle I was having. […]

Read more